Smartphones are the in things. If you don’t have one, then you’re old-fashioned, fuddy-duddy, boring, perhaps jobless. But in the entire generation of 30 somethings and above, there’s a segment (I hope) that have these smartphones, but little idea on how to use them. Technology, you see, if not respected, backfires. And can do so in more ways than one. Here are a few.
You end up sending random messages to people at two in the morning. These messages often sound like codes to receivers and keep them up deciphering for the rest of the night. My friend received one from a good looking colleague that went mmmaaayyyddifflldooo. And believe it or not, she sat up the whole night hoping it meant, ‘Meet me for coffee’. Turns out it wasn’t a cryptic cipher after all, but she definitely got an excuse to call him up again. 😉
You disconnect calls that you desperately want to answer. You know you need to scroll to the green to answer the call, but somehow in your desperation/ excitement you end up at the red. The call is disconnected, and you need to call back. This action not only costs you an apology that goes ‘Sorry, it got disconnected, I don’t know why. Useless service provider.’, but also hiked cellphone bills.
You somehow end up sending replies to people that go like ‘I’m in a meeting, please call back later.’ Your wildest friend wonders if you’re running a temperature. The husband worries about why you’ve suddenly gone formal with him: Is it the silent treatment or something? Turns out this one has its advantages too, which go phhutt when you tell them what actually happened.
The autocorrect automatically controls your life. You end up sending double-meaning messages to senior officers, professors, fathers in law, serious-minded relatives…basically the wrong people. Miss becomes kiss, smooth becomes smooch and set…well don’t even get there!
The battery dies in a couple of hours and you realize that your Internet charges have spiked up, even though you have no idea how to use that facility. What you finally discover is that all the programs were somehow working in the background. After giving you a patronizing look, a ten year old finally tells you how to stop them from doing so.
You end up telling people that you have a smartphone, but really don’t like to use the Internet all the time, because you hate seeing an entire generation wasting their time doing so. While the reality is that you really have NO idea!
Disclaimer: Lest you start thinking this is about me, wanted to add that it isn’t. Its about a fictitious character. A cousin. A far away friend of mine. A cousin’s friend actually. And btw, is there anyway you can turn off that darned auto-correct? Leave a comment below if you know. Or I’ll head to the closest school and find a 10 year old.